Every January, you and your clients set the usual goals. Lose weight, drink water, hit revenue targets, add clients, raise prices and clean up the chart of accounts. We love a measurable win.
Here’s the problem. You can hit every business goal and still feel wiped out. Your calendar stays full, but your life feels oddly empty. That is not a personality flaw, but a connection problem.
Research has linked strong social relationships to a 50% higher likelihood of survival. That comes from a meta-analysis across 148 studies. The U.S. Surgeon General’s advisory on loneliness and isolation says that a lack of social connection is a real health risk, with impact comparable to smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day. The WHO has also called out social connection as a major health issue tied to premature death and chronic disease risk.
So, let’s ask the question most firm owners avoid. What if you set a friendship resolution, not as a “nice extra,” but as part of running a sustainable practice?
A good friend does three things:
You do not need more friends. You just need better habits with the friends you already have.
Here’s the Friendship Resolution Framework you can run like a business plan. It works because it uses what accountants already trust: systems, categories and follow-through.
Create three tiers and keep it small so you actually do it.
Tier 1: Core of 5
These people get a monthly touchpoint: A call, coffee, walk or dinner. Put it on the calendar.
Tier 2: Growth of 3
These are “I like you, and I want to know you better” people. Aim for one meet-up per quarter.
Tier 3: Repair of 1
This is someone you miss. You do not need a speech; you just need a clean reach-out.
Yes, I’m calling these deliverables, because you might avoid this otherwise.
Here are three messages you can copy and send today.
You will notice none of these messages ask, “How are you?” because that question invites the automatic response: “Fine.”
Aim for ‘small, weekly and repeatable’. Pick one day each week for friendship admin. Just ten minutes. That is it. Send one text, one voice memo, or one calendar invite, but do not negotiate with yourself. You have already negotiated all day with clients.
If you want real connection, ask real questions. Try these three this year:
Then listen. Do not fix and do not coach. Just listen.
Here’s a handy template you can use to keep track of your friendship goals.
Name: ________ Tier: Core 5
Monthly action: Call or coffee
Weekly micro-habit: One check-in text
Next scheduled date: ________
Name: ________ Tier: Growth 3
Quarterly action: Invite to lunch or walk
Weekly micro-habit: One intro request to a mutual connection
Next scheduled date: ________
Name: ________ Tier: Repair 1
One-time action: Send reset message and an invite
Weekly micro-habit: Draft the message, then send it
Send-by date: ________
If you lead a practice, your relationships set your resilience level. They also shape referrals, hiring, and your ability to recover after a rough client week. The Harvard Study of Adult Development has pointed to relationships as a major driver of long-term well-being. When you strengthen friendships, you do not just feel better. You make better decisions and you become harder to knock over.
Your New Year business goals matter. Keep them, just add one more line item: “I will run friendship like it matters.”
So, here’s your measurable win that actually makes the rest of them sustainable. Who are the five people you refuse to lose this year? And what will you change this week, so your friendships do not live on leftovers?
Pick a number and put it on the calendar. Track it like you track revenue because if you can clean up a chart of accounts, you can clean up your “I’ve been meaning to call you” list too.